Chatting Makes WHAT??

Well, I never lacked experiences. Maybe some, but not many. And here's another fun-but-not-so-fun-at-all experience I will share with you guyss...chatting

Of course in this modern world, everyone knows what chatting is. It is a new and FAST way of communicating with others. And it is also a new and really modern way of communicating. So, instead of using telephones, cellphones or landlines, which will always takes time when use, everyone would use chatting as there main thing to communicate fastly. Just a single type, press enter, and voila! There it is...But, this is not where the use of chatting ends. As I say, its not only use to communicate with family or friends. We can also use this to meet some new friends from different countries or maybe in your own country. Many of us use this to meet some new friends...and maybe, your soulmate (hehe)..

now...let me tell you a story when I meet this not-so-lng friend in chatting...

I have this friends, his name is Osama, but I call him Chaamz. You see, I ask him why his nickname becomes Chaamz, I cant see any connection at all! So, he told me that when he is little, he cannot pronounce the letter S properly, so when he is saying his name, he would say "Ochama." Pretty good, huh? His sister would call him that name, and I call him in that name. So that makes the two of us...but I don't know if there is a lot more people that calls him by that name. Going back, I met this guy in gaiaonline.com (if you have read my previous blog, you would know about this) and I'm not happy at all. I'm left with this guy because he say he need to rest. So I let him. And when I'm finally alone, I feel really lonely. And Chaamz came to the rescue! He approach me and ask me questions and stuff like that. We instantly become friends. He ask me if I have an msn and I said I have. We chat every vacant time (and that's always at night).

Chaamz: hey hi.

me: hello.

That's what are first communication is like. It all started in there. Then followed by:

me: what are the things you do? You interested in something?

Chaamz: yeah, I'm interested in football, basketball etc..

Then we will go on and on and on and on and on...Instantly in there, I can really say we are quite close and I can really call him something; like a good friend.

Chatting has given me a new option in life. It's between, having fun and fulfilling life at it's fullest or staying in one corner, doing nothing but staring out in nowhere...

But still, there are a lot of things that would happen to you in chatting. I read a certain article about this and it says that bad people really is scattered in chat areas. They would befriended someone and then they would ask them to meet them. Then when they meet, something terrible may happened, maybe raped, abused, murder...so, always remember, safety first...

what you see or what you hear, it is not always the same to it's real self. We just have to learn to categorized things; from good to bad, and from joke to truth....

fOrUms...

First, let me ask you if you know the website friendster.com

If you dont know it, well, you better research it..but if you do, well listen here, man! I have this thing for you...

I'm not new in friendster. I mean, I've been using this website since last year! And, I can say that I have this experience to be sure that I can navigate this website well. But, this days, I'm not anymore interested in meeting friends, or giving comments to my friends. Bt now, what got my attention in friendster lately is its forums...you know forums, right?? Well, in case you dont know, its a public thing that you can create a topic, and ask other people their suggestions about it and what do they think about it...

At first, I'm really thrilled about what I am seeing in this page..I mean, God! I never knew there are other people who really share the same interests as I am! So, I reply to all the topics that got my attention. But one thing I notice about it, was that the criticism I saw in this page...of course, it's a public thing..so you have a lot of free talk in here...but I think, others got really abusive in this right. They are beginning to tease and destroy another persons image in this thing. I have read one such thing in here that talks about relationship. The girl confessed that her parents disagree with this guy and that her parents are right...that this boy will only hurt her. Then, when I scroll the page down, I see a reply post to this girl saying that she is an idiot, she's stupid, thing like that...and when I have gone to the next page, I see again another reply post to that guy, urging him to tease and criticize the girl more! Gosh, how can they be so insensitive? Don't they think they are ruining the girls privacy? And the girls rights about this thing?

From that time on, I've become more careful in posting in these forums...ok, maybe I'm a bit of a stubborn girl, but posting in forums really is a good thing so I can't stop...I'm afraid that maybe, someone would criticize me...someone would tease me and I dont like that! I dont want to make someone look so low and its me whose causing it! Oh, no, no! I dont like that thing!

So now, always remember that sensitivity is always the thing...you CAN'T practically live without it....(unless you really want to hurt others' feelings? I hope not)

brOkEn-hEArtEd...

I have seen a lot of people falling in love...my classmates, friends...but you know what, that's not the end of story. Every time I see them fall in love, I know there is something that will come after it: it's either they will last, or the truth will come out, that everything is meant to be just a not-so-funny joke: they will be broken-hearted. I never knew this society to be this cruel. I never knew this community could cause a lot of tears...

Being a shattered pieces on the floor, I know how it is to be broken. By someone you love most. But, I'm not yet a fully grown adult. And as I see it, people become really nuts when they fall in love, and in the end, they will only be broken...some of the teenagers I know (from 17-21 yrs old), they would really drown themselves with liquor...or worse, drugs. But the worst of the worst, they would KILL themselves. I don't know why they do that...because a young adult, and having a connection in the world wide web, I know that when somebody hurt you, and broke your heart, it only mean that someone out there is loving you more that he did. So, why do you need to kill yourself, why do you need to ruin your life, if there's this someone out there who really needs you?? Come to think of it, it's not your fault that you fall in love with the wrong person, right? And it is CLEARLY not your fault that he hurt you...it's their loss. So why would you ruin your life? That's the main question about being a broken-hearted.

After being shattered, piece by piece, for sure you would find it really hard to trust and love again. But, man, don't close your heart! There are billions of people in this planet, why would you be sad by one person? There are a lot more person experiencing this crisis, not only you....you just have to learn to move on, open up, and learn that not all persons are the same. Curse the one who hurt you, but, girl, it's not the end of the world...there are a lot more person in this world who are ready to love you!

So, stop being a loner, forget the past, and think about the future! There is someone you will find, that will surely lift you and will never ever leave and hurt you...not anymore, not again...

is it ok to fall in love to a persons personality??

nowadays, I'm into this website...

it's called http://www.gaiaonline.com/

its an online world were you can chat with other gaians (thats what you call the people in it) and add them up as your friends...you will create an avatar, and that avatar will roam around the virtual world where you can also see other people controlling their own avatars...

I'm playing this game by now, and i'm gonna tell you, its really FANTASTIC!! I already meet friends from different countries. And some of them are from my country...it is a really fun game! But, I'm not endorsing this game or something...I will share you this experience of mine that happened in gaiaonline..

I'm with my friends that day, we rent computers in a computer shop and the three of us were playing gaiaonline. All of us were thrilled because it is the first time that the three of us would be playing in a virtual world. I dragged them into this game because I'm sure they would enjoy it. Well, for a girl like us, adventure is always a game!! Going back, I met this boy avatar and I'll just call him Fled. He's sitting under a tree and when I approach him, we just introduced each other, and I learn that he is from Carribean and that he is 18 yrs old! God! He's older than me for I am only 14 yrs old...but, because I am interested in knowing him, I lied and just said that I am turning sixteen...we talk and talk, we share interests...I thought he was a writer because he can really play with words...he says I flatter him, and that made me proud...I don't want to flatter him, you know...Im just telling him my impression of him...

Time pass, I didn't even recognized that I am playing for over 3 hours!! I dont want to go but I have to...I didn't tell him first that I really need to go, then a while later, he tell me that he needs to rests because its 4:30 am in his country and its 4:30 pm in my country...so when we parted, we exchange hugs (through words) and we promised that we will meet again soon in gaia....we cant meet physically because his country is way too far for me, I can't afford a passport, you know?!!

The next day, me and my friends chat about what happened the day before...my friends were thrilled for me and they tell me they want to meet this Fled guy...I said it was OK for me but deep inside me, I really dont want to, because I'm afraid that maybe, Fled would be interested in my friends...but I didn't tell them that...I really love his personality..I like writers because they can play with words and they can really tell what they feel through words...my friend told me that I am nuts...how can I fall in love with someone I dont know that long? And I dont even see this person...I keep telling him that knowing his personality is enough for me...so in other words, I didn't follow her advice....

So that day, I rent again another computer and logged in to gaia and found out that he is also logged in...so I send him a message, asking him where he is (even though I already knew where he was, because he is also where I was), and he replied...a reply I didn't expected. He told me that he was with someone and that this girl is very depressed...what a neat lie...how could he tell that to me, when I can clearly see him in the screen, flirting (well not actually flirting as in flirting) with the girl...I was so shocked by what I see so I moved to another town, and there, I waited for myself to calm down..I really feel low and broken and played...I feel like a loser....

I dont know what happened next...I want to punch him in the face (if only I could do that!!)...next thing I know, he sent me a message (maybe the girl dumped him) asking me where I was...I didnt reply..then the message was followed by another....then another, and another....he send me a total of 7 messages that time...and I didnt reply...I fight the urge to reply to his message...he was asking me if I was busy, if I'm with someone, if I have a problem, what's the matter to me, why didn't I reply....ugh! I'm so fed up to him....I didn't reply to him...

I dont want to hear anymore of his lies...I dont want to ask him if the girl he was with was flirting with him...I wouldnt want to look so desperate...and I dont want to look like a jealous girlfriend...

I just didnt talk to him...

So now, do you think it is safe to fall in love with someone else's personality???

how do I know if they really are my friends??

I have 2 best friends: there name is Sam and Via...

If you asked me to whom am I closer with, i will really tell that I'm closer to Via...but when I asked others if who they think I'm closer, they would tell me that they think, I'm closer to Sam...well, if closeness physically, I'm really closer with Sam..she's my seatmate, and she really have the same interests like me..but even though she's one of my best friends, sometimes she really push me to the limit that I want to tell her I don't want to be her best friend and no one will ever like her if she continue acting like a spoiled brat...

Sam is my very first best friend since freshmen year...during the first day of school, she was seated beside me....my first impression of her was a spoiled girl who knows nothing about sensitivity of others...and guess what, I'm right...but we still became best friend..i don't know what really happened why she became my best friend...its just that she offer me free drinks on our lunch, we had some little chat, then Baam, were best friends. Were always seen together. She's always with me, I'm always with her. Were often found at the library that time, borrowing books and exchanging stories about what we just read.

Sam and I were the exact opposite...I'm the shy one and she's boost in confidence, I'm the smart one, and she's the studies-is-not-important girl. But were still best friends....Then, one thing I really notice about our friendship is that she's always jealous of me...not to the point that she would really do something to hurt me, but to the point that she would really do something to surpass me..and this incident happen...

I am fixing my wallet that time...and I am really sure I put it in my bag...I go to the CR after that and when it is our dismissal time, my wallet is gone! I don't know what to do that time! I don't care about my money, I don't care about my pictures! What I care is my test permit receipt!! I cant take the exam if I don't have my receipt! And I inserted it in my wallet! God! Then it strike me...I figure it out that Sam got my wallet...because tomorrow morning, she got this one heck of money..my speculations started there so I give distance between me and Sam...I don't want to be friends with a thief...so, my friendship between Sam ended there, and my friendship with Via bloom. My freshmen year ended and I still didn't reconcile with Sam, but she already know that I'm blaming her for what happened. I don't care, because of her, my parents really got angry with me, I take the exams late, and my grades really got affected by that.

When the second year finally arrive, Sam act like nothing really happened. The anger with me is gone that time, so we are best friends again this time. The three of us actually. But this sophomore year in my life, my section is mixed with other students from the other section last year. And now, there's Mateo, a girl who got real close with Via. And I cant do something about that..I just let them, and now I got stuck with Sam. Our previous relationship as friends return, and now I'm happy with her. But there are this happenings that still happen. I lost my assignments, my money, my ballpens, even my book!! I don't know why this is happening with me. This things stop when I ended my friendship with Via started and my friendship with Sam ended. But now that we are friends again, this things are happening again...will you blame me if I accuse her last year??

And also, there are this things that I also notice. Our interests are only alike. We both love books ad surfing the Net. But besides that, there is nothing more we have in common. And she always leave me during our break time, which leaves me nothing to do. She always tell my other friends about the things I'm telling her. And God knows how much I hated it when she do that. I'm beginning to think if my friendship with her is really worth it. I'm thinking, always thinking what my life would have turn out if she's not my best friend. I'm always wondering that things. I have this need of her, a feeling that I cant live without her. She and I are really close, but there are this things that would really keep our bonds apart. I don't know....i don't know what to do...

Do you think Sam is really a true friend after doing those things to me? Do you think she is still worth of the faith I'm giving her? These question, I don't know yet the answers...who knows?? Maybe she'll change...and who knows?? Maybe one day, she'll be aware of everything, every single thing she's doing to me..My own best friend....i really cant believe this things are happening to me......

how i hate being in LOVE!! (again)

ugh!!

Here i am again! Being in love again with the same kind of guy! The same guy...so numb, so dumb, so...everything!!!! I hate them!! But tell me why do i love this guys? Is there something wrong with me that I always fell in love with liars?? OK...I thought, I really thought that I will never be in love after my "breakup" with my ex..but, hello, here i am again...in LOVE!! Let me tell you the story of my ex...

It all started when I'm in 4th grade...and that time, i really don't have ANY interests in crush, boys, and even LOVE..i don't believe in such dumb thing. All i want is for my parents to be proud of me as their daughter, be proud of me! That's all I want in my life...but I'm still human, i still have this crush, and OK, hes my ex...i have a crush on him that year, 4th grade (that's the time he enrolled in my school). And the time our teacher introduced us to him, and he introduced himself to us, he really got my attention. But, it's not a crush as in I'm obsessed in him? No way, girl! I kinda thought that time that my crush on him is just....just for fun...so I can have something to think on when I'm doing nothing except studying...so that's what happened...

When I reach 6th grade, I still have this crush in him, and it's still the same, just for fun...and accidentally, we became friends..it's not that it's a great deal, but I really don't like boys that time..so its really a surprise for my friends when I befriended or some guy befriended me. So that's when my bestie's have a hint of my crush on him..so time went, and its only 4 months before our graduation...when my best friend, Kyle (she's a girl) accidentally slip and told me that my ex, also had a crush on me...since fourth grade!!! God, I was soo shocked...so this boy had a crush on me, huh? At first I don't believe her, but when the whole class know it, every time I am near my ex, they tease me..so, I just tell him that we'll just communicate through cellphone...so we exchange numbers and we text...we really got close in text without anyone (even my bestie's knowing it)...then, on Christmas Eve, we really text each other ALL DAY, nonstop...were like a couple..Then he just asked me, if we are already a couple...SHUCKS!! I don't know what to answer...i stop texting him for about 2 hours..thinking about what to answer him...then, this feeling overpower me, and I thought, I'M IN LOVE!!! So i just called him through land line...and there I answer him..haha...he's so happy, and me too!! I never know my crush on him would be develop like this..so, when the comeback to school happened, we really make a cute couple in the campus...w/o my parents knowing it...

I began spending more of my time with my ex that my parents began noticing my grade failing...they asked me about it so i tell them the truth....i was so afraid they would get mad at me, but, boy, they say they were happy for me!! God!!

The graduation was nearing, only 2 months left...me and my ex would soon be apart...because he was telling me that he will be transferred because his father was assigned to another state here in my country..so, except of crying, i just told him that we better do everything we want before we part...that's what happened..

But I still didn't tell you what made me hate my ex the most that I really regret even having those good memories w/ him...EVERYTHING HE TOLD ME WAS NOT TRUE!! That his father was assigned to another state...that's a lie!! Because when I accidentally met her mother at the mall, we had a chat at a restaurant, and she tell me that my ex want to transfer school..so it is that stupid bastard who want to transfer school..i was so shocked again..i didn't go to school for about a week...and when i showed up, that lying guy fake a concerned face! I was so disgusted just seeing his face so I slap him, tell him all the lies he tell, telling him all the things her mother tell me...I didn't give him the chance to talk but I don't care whatever explanation he would give me..I DON'T CARE ABOUT HIM ANYMORE!!! So, after that breakup, i cried and cried...I even repeated two movies in the movie land...because that is my hiding place...there i cried silently...

so, now...after that tragic incident in my love life, i created a vow to myself never to love a lying bitch again....but one day, I DID IT AGAIN!! I love again another boy..now, I still don't know what will happen to us...he just made me cry...after two years of having a crush on him, all he made me do is to cry, to cry, cry, and cry a little more...and cry again...

I hate being in love!! But it gives me pleasure having someone to think to...what will i do???

ugh!!